Corey Stokes

So you want to get out of debt? I think the plan to reduce your debt is so simple that I will not stress it here. There are hundreds if not thousands of books, radio shows, television shows, and speakers out there that will promises to help reduce your debt or even get you debt free.   Yet many of you reading this will still not take advantage of the assistance designed to help you accomplish the goal. Even if you do take advantage of it, there is something that is causing you to fail! Until you change that one thing, it does not matter whether you are going to pay off your Macy’s card or your Master card first.  What the experts do not tell you, is you need to change yourself first!

I had attempted to get out of debt three times before I finally was successful. The first time my wife, (then girlfriend) used money she’d allocated for school to pay off my charge cards balances. A few years later, I was enrolled in a debt consolidation program to help manage my payments, that did not work!   Using the program did help me get out of debt however, as I later learned, It does nothing for changing your behaviors. A few year after the program I was still spending money I didn’t have, and piling on the debt.

The second time, I started making some real progress. I had one credit card that was for emergencies. I had consolidated all of the preexisting debt to this one card and ensured that I had just a little to use in case something came up. Then, SURPRISE! Something came up. It was Christmas and I wanted to be sure the family had everything they wanted. By the time New Year’s Day came around, bills were due, the electricity was about to be cut off and my emergency credit card was maxed out.

The third time I finally made it stick. My wife came across Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover. This book is awesome because Dave offers a simple plan that is easy to understand and it works for many people. Susie Orman’s books are also helpful although there are some things about it that I am not a fan of. With that being said, she does offer great tips on how to manage your finances. What I found to be the least helpful about following these writers is that they did not tell me anything I did not already know. That’s the thing that got me the most. I already knew this information (just like many of you reading this do as well) but the application is where I needed the help and Dave offered me just that. Specifically, what I knew was cut spending, build an emergency fund, Pay down debt, start saving.  What I changed was how I did these things. What make this time different? Self-Control! While reading the Dave’s book he said if you can control the man or woman in the mirror then you can do anything! That was my eureka moment!

Self-control was my first step in reducing my debt successfully and I offer you the same guidance. Even before I made a payment to pay down debt, I knew I had to get control of my actions, emotions, and most importantly my habits. Once I did that, I knew that I could do anything! Here are the first three things I did:

1. Discovering bad habits- the first thing I did was determined which of my bad money habits I wanted to change. Such as: eating out every day, dipping into savings, spending on credit. Each of these things was something I controlled, and they affected my ability to start my debt reduction plan. I put myself on an allowance system that allowed me to have just enough funds in my pocket to do what I needed (e.g. transportation, and for the occasional office outing).

2. Created new habits – many of the books say, you cannot eliminate a habit. You need to replace it with a new one. So instead of going out to lunch every day, I packed a lunch. Instead of dipping into savings I ensure out of every paycheck I paid myself first, and instead of spending on credit I cancelled all of my credit cards an opened an account so I can put money to do everything I wanted to do without going into debt. In other words I started saving for the things I wanted.

3. Created a Goal/ Reward System – When you win, you get an award which makes you want to win more to get more awards!  This is exactly what my wife and I did.  We set goals and rewarded ourselves when we completed the goal to help keep us motivated.   The bigger the goal-the bigger the reward! This did not only help us to learn to set goals, it also reinforced the habits that we were trying to build. Here is what I mean. My wife and I were in desperate need of a vacation. Although all of the experts say, when you’re in debt vacations take a vacation, our stress levels demanded otherwise. So we drew proverbial a line in the sand (actually it was on our budget sheet) and determined we will take a vacation after we crossed the line. This was no easy task! For the 6 months that followed we buckled down and paid off three of our debts. That summer we saved up and went on our first cruise! Although the cruise was awesome, the cruise was not even the best part! The best part of the vacation was that it was all paid for in cash!

It does not matter where or when you start or whose plan you use. Whether you pay for that plan (although I do not recommend paying a service provider to do something that you can do yourself) or use the millions of free resources that are available, you must start with controlling yourself first. Without self-control, you’ll find yourself running in circles, and getting nowhere!