In the world of aerospace engineering, which Roy Moye III knows quite well, there is a concept called “thrust.” It is the force that moves an aircraft through the air. But thrust doesn’t happen in a vacuum. It requires resistance. It requires a journey through the atmosphere to prove that the machine can actually do what it was designed to do.
During my conversation with Roy, we spent a significant amount of time talking about his “wilderness” years—the nine years in corporate aerospace before he took the leap into full-time music and entrepreneurship with Stem Music LLC. It’s easy to look at Roy now—Grammy-nominated, local celebrity, successful business owner—and think that his “success” began the moment he quit his job.
But I challenged Roy on that, and I want to challenge you on it today. Success isn’t the destination. Success is the journey.
“Success is you becoming the person you were meant to be, in order to succeed.”
The Arrival Fallacy
Most of us suffer from what psychologists call “The Arrival Fallacy.” It’s the belief that once we reach a certain milestone—the promotion, the 20,000-word book draft, the thriving business—we will finally be “successful” and, by extension, happy.
But here is the truth I’ve learned through my own transition from a 23.5-year Air Force career to becoming an author and head of a department: The “arrival” is usually just a 15-minute high. Once you get there, you realize the goalposts have already moved, and the stakes have gotten even higher.
If you don’t learn to embrace the journey, you will spend 99% of your life feeling like a failure while waiting for that 1% of time when you’re standing on the podium. Roy and I discussed how his time in the cubicle wasn’t “wasted time.” It was the “flight prep.” Every spreadsheet he managed and every engineering problem he solved was building the discipline he would later need to manage a national educational brand.
Defining the Journey of Success
In my Core 5 Framework, I often talk about the interplay between where we are and where we are going. Success is the consistent application of your values over time. It is not a trophy; it is a trajectory.
When I spoke to Roy about his journey, I shared my perspective on why the middle part—the part where you’re tired, the part where the “wilderness” feels endless—is actually the most sacred.
1. The Journey is Where Your Character is Forged. You cannot handle the weight of a calling if you haven’t built the muscle during the journey. If Roy had been handed a Grammy-nominated platform in year one, he might not have had the “extreme ownership” mindset required to sustain it. The journey teaches you how to handle “No,” pivot, and stay grounded when the “Yes” finally comes.
2. The Journey Provides the Context for the Calling. Roy’s calling—using music to teach STEM ( Science, Technology, Engineering, & Math)—wouldn’t exist without his engineering background. If he had skipped the “boring” engineering years, his music wouldn’t have the authority it has today. Your current “wilderness” is providing the very data and experience you will need to serve people later.
Learning to “Bloom” Where You are Planted
Roy used a beautiful metaphor during our talk: he said he is currently in a “blooming” season. But you can’t bloom if you haven’t spent time as a seed in the dark, and you can’t bloom if you haven’t grown deep roots during the rainy seasons.
Embracing the journey means recognizing which season you are in.
- Are you in the Clarity season, just trying to figure out what the next step is?
- Are you in the Courage season, where you have to take a leap into the unknown?
- Or are you in the Consistency season, where the work feels repetitive but you know the growth is happening underground?
I told Roy that the reason he is successful today isn’t because he’s on a board or on a stage; it’s because he stayed true to the “Flight Plan” even when the visibility was zero.
The “Wilderness” is Not a Wrong Turn
Many people feel that if they haven’t “made it” by a certain age, they’ve failed. But as we discussed in the episode, the “wilderness” is often where God (or the universe) is doing the most work.
In the Bible, the Israelites spent 40 years in the wilderness. It wasn’t because they were lost; it was because they weren’t ready for the “Promised Land” yet. They had to shed a “slave mentality” and adopt a “sonship mentality.” Similarly, Roy had to shed the “employee mentality” and adopt the “entrepreneurial calling” before he could truly take flight.
If you are in a season of struggle, stop asking, “When will this be over?” and start asking, “What am I learning right now that I can’t learn anywhere else?”
The “Flight Plan” Forward
To embrace the journey, you have to change your metrics for success.
- Old Metric: Did I hit my goal today?
- New Metric: Was I consistent today? Did I move the needle one inch? Did I learn something new?
When I sit down to reflect on my goals, I don’t just look at whether I hit the goal of writing the 20,000-word book draft; I look at the strategic narrative of the day. Did I show up? Did I connect with my family? Was I a person of integrity? Did I learn something new that will improve me?
If the answer is yes, then the day was a success, regardless of the “outcome.”
Closing Thoughts
Roy Moye III is “taking flight” now because he spent nearly a decade on the runway. He embraced the journey of the “engineer-artist” long before he was given a title for it.
Your calling is calling you right now—not just to a destination, but to a process. Don’t rush it. Don’t despise the small beginnings. And most importantly, don’t let the fear of not being “there” yet stop you from being “here” now.
The full interview with Roy Moye III can be found by clicking on Catching up with Corey, or by visiting my YouTube page.
Corey Stokes 